When I teach listening skills, my participants struggle with simply being still and present when someone else is sharing something personal with them. It is not enough, in their mind, just to be with them. They must at least nod, or verbally acknowledge the other person in some way, and make them feel that they are being attended to.
We must do in conversation, not just be in conversation!
This need stems from a deep and old belief that who we are being is not enough. Our presence, and the gift of our spirit, is simply not enough!
When we realize how powerful we are, we don’t doubt the gift of our presence.
By resting more fully into our deeper Self, we can rest more fully in the conversation. Spaciousness is created in the conversation that supports authenticity to arise and comfort to be felt. The safety of our loving presence invites it.
The next time you feel the urge to do in conversation, take a deep breath and trust your presence is enough. Simply sit back and listen, and make it ok to be still and silent. You may enjoy the conversation more, and discover more about who you are speaking with.
“Deep listening is miraculous for both listener and speaker. When someone receives us with open-hearted, non-judging, intensely interested listening, our spirits expand.” Sue Patton Thoele
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Check out Vince’s book: Let the Fire Burn ~ Nurturing the Creative Spirit of Children, A Children’s Book for Adults