Healing Your Inner Star Child and Liberating the Innocence and Power of Your Soul Star Essence

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Healing Your Inner Star Child and Liberating the Innocence and Power of Your Soul Star Essence

“The nitrogen in our DNA, the calcium in our teeth, the iron in our blood, the carbon in our apple pies were made in the interiors of collapsing stars. We are made of starstuff.” ― Carl Sagan, Cosmos We are all children of God, the Universe, Christ, Buddha Consciousness, Brahman, whatever feels right to you. And each of us has what I call a soul star essence; for, we are, along with everything else, made of stardust! Hydrogen, nitrogen, your computer and clothes, everything is made from this magical and primordial Source! Knowing, embracing and shining our star nature is essential to our fulfillment, to realizing our soul purpose. And healing our inner star child is a big part of that.  Disconnection from divinity The root of all […]

“If I lose the pain, I’ll lose the love.” ~ The Double Bind Nature of Trauma Bonds

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“If I lose the pain, I’ll lose the love.” ~ The Double Bind Nature of Trauma Bonds

“People have two needs: Attachment and authenticity. When authenticity threatens attachment, attachment trumps authenticity.” ~ Dr. Gabor Mate The child who endures abuse from a parent is stuck in an impossible bind. If he pushes away, he loses the parent. If he doesn’t, he endures the abuse. Children generally choose attachment over authenticity. It is a biological imperative to do so that comes from many generations of living in tribal societies where our life depended on being in connection with our community; from being dependent on one another for survival. If that bond was to break and we were outcasted, abandoned, it could mean our life. Attachment is also biologically wired into us because we need our parents, especially our mother, for nurturing and survival. […]

The Therapeutic Power of Play to Heal Shame in Children

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The Therapeutic Power of Play to Heal Shame in Children

The nature of shame is to hide. It keeps pain hidden, the dark corners of our psyche concealed from the masses, too unbearable to share with others, too unbearable to be seen. Look at people with tremendous shame and their head tilts down, their eyes avert contact. Many even have a hard time looking straight into a camera. They must look away. The pain of shame and blame runs that deep.  Children are, of course, not immune to shame. Raised in abusive, neglectful, toxic environments, shame inevitably buries into their psychophysiology. Beliefs such as “I am wrong”, “I am bad”, “It’s my fault” are common amongst children who experience chronic failures in love; who grow up not feeling emotionally or physically safe; who come to […]

Why the Nuanced Language of the Soul is Rare and Needed in These Times of Growing Divisive Opinion

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Why the Nuanced Language of the Soul is Rare and Needed in These Times of Growing Divisive Opinion

“Out beyond ideas of wrongdoing  and rightdoing there is a field. I’ll meet you there. “When the soul lies down in that grass the world is too full to talk about.” ― Rumi As the world moves into increasing complexity and confusion, the lightness of nuanced language will be necessary to navigate the darkness. Because nuance is the language of the whispering, mysterious soul, and these are mysterious times. At a time when there is a platform for every person to shout from, and an ever-saturated supply of all sorts of conflicting mainstream and alternative information, there is a pull, for so many, to write and speak to our growing collective uncertainty. To toss their opinion into the widening arena of debate and conjecture. As […]

The Wisdom of Pain and Suffering ~ Surrendering to the Gifts of Weakness in a World that Pedestalizes Strength

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The Wisdom of Pain and Suffering ~ Surrendering to the Gifts of Weakness in a World that Pedestalizes Strength

“Be crumbled. So wild flowers will come up where you are. You have been stony for too many years. Try something different. Surrender.” ~ Rumi “To be worn out is to be renewed.” ~ Lao Tzu Pain and suffering are difficult gateways no one avoids. We wish it was different, but it is the way of life. They are fierce and necessary teachers at times, initiating us to disarmour, soften into vulnerability, into our heart. They wear the edges off our hubris and pride so we become humble and compassionate in ways we could not without the adversity. To feel more deeply at a cellular and soul level.  Pain and suffering did exactly this for me. Bit-by-bit, they crumbled the arrogant, overly-driven and insensitive man […]

The Dark Forces are Waiting for You to Show Up in Your Power

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The Dark Forces are Waiting for You to Show Up in Your Power

Maybe the dark forces are waiting for You to show up in your Power. And that in spending so much time pointing them out, highlighting their nefarious hidden agendas, you can continue hiding your light. All the while you confuse your persistent pointing with your power. It’s a deceptive and convenient game many are playing these days.  Your power arises first from confronting your powerlessness. This is the purpose of tribal initiation practices and rights of passage—giving youth a taste of the depth and wisdom of uncertainty and vulnerability; of giving way to a higher force. Because most in the West have not been initiated, they, most naturally, are afraid to be powerless. Yet there are significant consequences. Namely, that they project this fear onto […]

Rising Levels of Complexity and Confusion Serve to End the Division of Self from Life

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Rising Levels of Complexity and Confusion Serve to End the Division of Self from Life

Let it all come to an increasing boil, as is happening now. Let it boil away your ideas of right and wrong, good and bad. For, whatever narrative you choose, I can assure you, it is wrong… unless it is right, unless both, unless neither.  That is yours to decide.  Ultimately, God, The Universe, or whatever you wish to call It, cares and does not care about your preferences, your ideas of what is or what should be. It has its own reasons and ways, irregardless of your own.  So often, humans confuse their preferences with truth. It’s worth considering that whatever narrative we choose, whatever preference or bias we have, whatever we feel should or should not happen, may not be it. May not […]

Forget Positivity. Black People Have a Right and Need to Rage and Protest. This is Their Time for Healing.

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Forget Positivity. Black People Have a Right and Need to Rage and Protest. This is Their Time for Healing.

In regards to healing, the way out is the way through. It’s not necessarily about feeling better, but being better able to feel the full magnitude of what the body has kept at bay.  There are some voices out there insinuating that the Black Lives Matter riots are problematic because, due to the law of attraction, they bring more violence to those involved. Violence attracts more violence. People “should not” be expressing their pain this way. That there should be a more “positive” or “constructive” way for Black people to express their anguish.  So I need to offer a trauma resolution informed perspective, here.  When I assist people with their healing in my practice, and they, for example, uncover memories of sexual abuse, in every […]

The Safe, Inviting and Eloquent Language of “I Miss” to Bring Another into Your Heart

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The Safe, Inviting and Eloquent Language of “I Miss” to Bring Another into Your Heart

Language is powerful. One word can make or break a conversation. Yes, most of what we communicate lies in the unspoken, the space between the words or energy underlying them; but the words you choose have the power to bring someone closer to your heart or further away. Connection—the tube The heart of communication is connection. Consider connection to be like a tube running from my heart to yours. The wider the tube, the larger the connection; the more can be passed through, felt and experienced between us. That tube is never static—it’s always changing given how something is communicated and what is being communicated. The tube, or openness between two people, fluctuates moment-to-moment depending on the words chosen, one’s energy and body language—the three main aspects […]

A Love Whose Time Has Come ~ Healing the Disembodied Human and Our Ravaged Planet

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A Love Whose Time Has Come ~ Healing the Disembodied Human and Our Ravaged Planet

“A person suffers if he or she is constantly being forced into the statistical mentality and away from the road of feeling.“ ~ Robert Bly We are a disembodied species, deprived of the weighted feeling of being in touch with our senses, attuned to the murmurings of our heart, the pleasures, ecstatic and intimate, that go with rootedness. We have lost touch with the once innate feeling of connectivity to strangers, the delight in a butterfly, the awe when struck by the glowing moon’s presence. We have squandered the feeling worlds of imagination and creativity born in pause and even boredom.  And we’ve lost touch with the inborn capacity to feel profound sadness and anger, fear and pain, to be unbridled in our emotional expression, […]